Saturday, January 14, 2012

Buffalo Wild Wings


Buffalo Wild Wings
9701 Roosevelt Blvd
Philadelphia, PA 19114
(215) 552-0025










Ultimate Nachos


Step up to the plate. Chili, pico de gallo, shredded lettuce, jalapenos, queso and salsa all atop a mound of fresh, corn tortilla chips.

Price: $8.19

with chicken $9.19


Whenever I stroll into a sports bar I typically feel out of my element. In a land of flat screen TVs, chicken wings, and latterly-bought jerseys the only constant consolation I can rely on is nachos. Whether they are called "Grand Slam Nachos," or "Hat Trick Nachos," or even "The Immaculate Nachos," I know what to expect. Unfortunately, that which I expect is generally a mediocre nacho appetizer. Buffalo Wild Wings did not disappoint as I "stepped up to the plate."

When I saw "Ultimate Nachos" listed in the menu I certainly didn't think that my quest is finally over and I can go back to my life as a mild-mannered nerd. However, I do think there should be more than a couple of handfuls of chips dropped in a basket with some vegetable garnish thrown on top. The chili and cheese that were used to bind this appetizer together were actually more boring than a quite evening in watching curling. In fact, the cheese was so fascinatingly nondescript that this is the actual transcript between my girlfriend and I as I was first tasting it:

Kristan: Baby, I am so happy to be with you. I love you.
Faust: What kind of cheese is this???

Seriously.

So, I suggest that Buffalo Wild Wings change the name of the platter to "Roberto De Vicenzo Nachos" because golf is the most boring sport in the world and I fucking hate it. See, every sports bar should be required to brand their platters with hackneyed sports puns that best represent those platters. Then, and only then, will I fill more comfortable at these establishments.

  • Presentation: 4
  • Assembly: 3
  • Uniqueness: 4
  • Value: 3
  • Taste: 4
  • Overall: 3.6

Chili's Bar & Grill


Chili's Bar & Grill
2320 West Oregon Ave
Philadelphia, PA 19145

(215) 468-3757










Classic Nachos


With melted cheese, jalapenos, beans, queso and a hint of seasoned beef. Served with house-made pico de gallo and sour cream.

Price:

Large: $7.89
Regular $6.29

Add chicken or fajita beef
Large: $9.89
Regular: $8.29

Add guacamole for .99c


Faust: Whoa. Déjà vu.
Trinity: What did you just say?
Faust: Nothing. Just had a little déjà vu.
Trinity: What did you see?
Cypher: What happened?
Faust: I once ate a platter of nachos at TGI Friday, and then another that looked just like it at Chili's.
Trinity: How much like it? Was it the same nachos?
Faust: It might have been. I'm not sure.
Morpheus: Switch! Apoc!
Faust: What is it?
Trinity: A déjà vu is usually a glitch in the Matrix. It happens when they change something.

After my wonderful nacho experience at TGI Friday I was actually looking forward to eating nachos at other large chain restaurants while admiring all the "interesting" flea market finds plastered across the walls. Well, be careful what you wish for. This platter was almost an exact replica of the TGIF nacho platter, but smaller. Now, this certainly isn't a bad thing, it's just the same thing, even with all the options listed above. I was hoping to find something a little more exclusive and unique from a massive corporate restaurant chain. Oh, wait. Now I see the error in my judgement...

Nothing says "corporate" more than an ice cream scoop of guacamole!

  • Presentation: 7
  • Assembly: 8
  • Uniqueness: 3
  • Value: 7
  • Taste: 8
  • Overall: 6.6