Sunday, July 31, 2011

AMC Neshaminy 24


AMC Neshaminy 24
3900 Rockhill Dr
Bensalem, PA 19120
(215) 396-8050










Movie Nachos


Since there isn't an exact description on the AMC food board menu that could make these nachos sound any less generic, here is some info you wish you didn't know:

Calories 1108 Sodium 1720 mg
Total Fat 59 g Potassium 40 mg
Saturated 19 g Total Carbs 132 g
Polyunsaturated 0 g Dietary Fiber 8 g
Monounsaturated 0 g Sugars 1 g
Trans 0 g Protein 25 g
Cholesterol 58 mg

Vitamin A 0% Calcium 280%
Vitamin C 0% Iron 0%

Price: $7.00. Then darkness...


So, Frito Lay teamed up with AMC to bring you this delicious movie theater nacho experience at a very reasonable price (italic font = too much sarcasm) . Even though these nachos are the most overly simplistic, mass produced and tasteless foodstuff you can ever imagine overpaying for, I feel compelled to order them every single time I go see a shitty movie about super heroes, fast cars, or anything starring Nicolas Cage (preferably a combination of all three).

This box-o-nachos has to be laced with some sort of amnesia-inducing agent which is the only sensible reason for me to order them on a regular basis. Perhaps the inordinate amount of salt is actually a sodium chloride conspiracy conducted by a shadowy government agency with the intention of fattening up the American populace to make us more more obedient, less perceptive, and perpetuate the pharmaceutical industry? Okay, maybe my mom was right and I do go to the movies a little too often. Therefore, I will concede that it is more likely that any living organism ingesting this volume of salt in one sitting simply destroys all brain cells related to long term memory (when being ingested within a running time of 90 minutes or less, of course).

  • Presentation: 2
  • Assembly: 3
  • Uniqueness: 1
  • Value: 1
  • Taste: 2
  • Overall: 1.8

Friday, July 29, 2011

Nick's Roast Beef


Nick's Roast Beef
2212 Cottman Ave
Philadelphia, PA 19149
(215) 745-1292










Nachos Supreme


There wasn't a description listed in the menu, but this "Nachos Supreme" platter was lumped between Hot Nachos (strangely enough is what my girlfriend said you will shit out afterward as well) and Buffalo Wings. Odd? Yes. I would certainly say so considering the presentation of this platter.

Price: $6.99


These nachos are a staple for the monthly "boys-night-out" with my old (literally and figurati... literally) high school friends. Why? Not only do they have an extremely high fat content (and therefor taste heavenly), but the chips are actually in a separate basket. This certainly helps me to not throw up while watching four guys repeatedly stick their spit covered fingers into my cheesy nacho dinner. What is truly unique about this nacho platter is the fried edible nacho bowl that has a wonderful texture unto itself. I have to imagine the bulk of the nacho toppings within said bowl are just leftover taco filling recycled from unfinished meals. Smothered in cheese. Still, nice.

  • Presentation: 7
  • Assembly: 6
  • Uniqueness:7
  • Value: 8
  • Taste: 6
  • Overall: 6.8

New Boulevard Diner


New Boulevard Diner

11650 Roosevelt Blvd
Philadelphia, PA 19116

(215) 676-0797










Loaded Nachos
Piled high with Melted Cheeses, Chili, Diced Tomatoes, Jalapeno Peppers, Shredded Lettuce, Sour Cream & Salsa
Price: $7.50

Let's face it, what can one really expect from a diner other than an excellent slice of scrapple? Well, that and gravelly-voiced waitresses of course. The “Melted Cheeses” were probably individually wrapped slices of orange Kraft Singles. The salsa may have come from a large nondescript tin can stolen from the Good Will drop-off. Personally, I enjoy Tostito’s Restaurant Style Salsa and would have preferred it over this incredibly generic tasting tasteless-salsa. And finally, I’m pretty sure those are bloody finger prints around the circumference of my plate. Perhaps the cook cut his finger whilst shredding my wilted lettuce. Not exactly the way I would have preferred to start off this blog, but that can only mean better days are ahead...

  • Presentation: 2
  • Assembly: 2
  • Uniqueness: 3
  • Value: 2
  • Taste: 2
  • Overall: 2.2